How To Avoid Nuclear Problems In Child Custody Disputes
Published On: January 29, 2014
Although January is the month where the most divorces are initiated during the year, many people who decide to split may do so without considering the effect it will have on school aged children. While a January divorce may signal a new beginning for one parent, it may be awkward for kids who are in the middle of a school year (even though they are ostensibly starting a new semester).
Because of this, it is important that parents take their children’s feelings into consideration by thinking critically about the feelings of insecurity, anxiety and guilt that kids may feel as they learn about the divorce. In essence, parents should ask themselves the following questions:
- Have you put their emotional and psychological needs above your own?
- Are you looking to them to be “go-betweens” with the other spouse, or a “spy” to learn what he or she is up to?
- Are you asking the child to choose between you or your soon-to-be ex-spouse?
- Are you keeping the child (or children) from the other parent in order to hurt them?
- Have you made disparaging or disrespectful remarks about the other parent in front of the children?
If the answer to any of these questions is “yes” it is imperative that you recognize that these are destructive behaviors and that they could ultimately work against you in a custody or parenting time dispute. Family court judges are trained to see these behaviors and they will protect children from parents who exhibit them